It’s about time the USA put a decent basketball team together. You got Carmelo, James, and Bryant. We as a country are in a war and we need to show the rest of the world we can still ball.

A good basketball team can really do a lot for a country’s self esteem. Anybody remember the first Dream Team? It’s like the USA created this beautiful monster and sent it out to destroy other countries, Terminator style. Any coincidence we later won the Gulf War? I think nah-uh.

That first team was so good they had not one, not two, not three, but FOUR (shizzle) white guys on it! And one guy was still in high school I believe. They didn’t even need a coach, they just threw Chuck Daly in for kicks. I could have coached them to at least the bronze.

Then there was the first game.

Holy shit.

Angola apparantly has a basketball team. And it went like this: Michael Jordan shot free throws with his eyes closed, Barkley was texting on the court, and Pippen impregnated a woman during a timeout. All that leads to a 116-48 gang banging.

I laughed at other teams, I even cheered on Scottie Pippin, and I was proud to be an American.

Here’s to you Mr. USA:

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 29th, 2007 at 4:31 am and is filed under Ass Whupin', Basketball. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.